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June 2004 New Perceptions Success Letter By Kate Ripp Certified Professional Coach Success strategies to support you in your professional and personal growth. Please feel free to forward this newsletter in its entirety to colleagues and friends. ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ June 2004 E-mail: kateripp@ktrconsulting.com Web Site: http://www.ktrconsulting.com ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ How to enhance the conversation and still make your point Many start a sentence or response to another person with a negative connotation, often with the words no, but or however. This sends the message that “You’re wrong. I know better, so just be quiet.” This doesn’t mean we should not disagree. Instead, credit the other person’s point of view and respond with “Yes, and…”. This response will not shut down the conversation but rather, build upon it. It’s even more interesting to observe how often we begin with no, but or however, when we DO agree. This tells the other person that “I already know that.” Try saying “Great idea” instead of disregarding their thoughts. A common issue with smart, successful people is trying to be right too often. Let’s say your significant other wants to go to a movie and you would rather go to a stage play. You reluctantly agree to go to the movie and it turns out to be a bomb. You have two choices: a) complain and say you should have gone to the play or b) decide to have a nice evening and enjoy each others company. I teach my clients that to be a good communicator, you have to be a good listener. Listen, take a deep breath and ask yourself if it’s worth it to speak at that moment. More often than not, people say it’s better to listen first. You better understand what the person is trying to say so they can fashion a more relaxed and appropriate response. When you listen with patience and gentleness, people can think along with you. They won’t do that if they think you’ll bowl them over with your needing to be right. When in disagreement with someone else, assume good faith. Don’t assume wicked intentions on their part. Just explain that there is a difference of thought. Things can go sour when you assume bad faith. In reality, most people who disagree with you do so with high intentions. Listening without judgment, using “yes and” responses, and assuming good faith in your conversations with others, will open up possibility for enhanced communications and the opportunity to make your point without shutting the other person or the conversation down. Copyright 2004 by Kate Ripp—All Rights Reserved =============================================================== FREE ONE HOUR TELECLASS JUNE 10 AND JUNE 11 ***The Nine Frameworks for Solopreneuring Success*** Learn these essentials to creating success in the one-person professional-services business. To find out more or to register go to: June 10 http://www.teleclassinternational.com/catalog_full.html?courseid=2728 June 11 http://www.teleclassinternational.com/catalog_full.html?courseid=2729 =============================================================== Fast-track your success by taking advantage of a COMPLIMENTYARY COACHING SESSION To schedule your complimentary session, e-mail Kate at kateripp@ktrconsulting.com or call 303-697-5914. =============================================================== For subscription changes click on Comments, questions or suggestions? Please e-mail Coach Ripp at help@ktrconsulting.com We will NEVER release, sell or give a subscriber’s name or email address to any other party to organization. Our subscribers will only receive email messages that contain requested information, new monthly articles or announcements of new services. =============================================================== Kate Ripp coaches small business owners and professionals. She is a high-energy coach with twenty years of corporate management experience and hands-on knowledge in the areas of leadership, strategic planning, operations, sales, and strategic account management. She coaches one-on-one, in groups, and delivers workshops to improve communication, reduce conflict and foster teamwork in the business environment. Kate is a Professional Certified Coach, a graduate of Coach U and a member of the International Coach Federation. She can be reached at 303-697-5914 or kateripp@ktrconsulting.com . Visit her web-site at http://www.ktrconsulting.com =============================================================== |
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